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Touching Other People's Babies

By Purple Pen

What is it with people and babies? Especially other people's babies? Would you reach out and put your hands on someone's three year old? Five year old? Ten year old? NO. So why is it seemingly okay for you to touch someone's one month old or 6 month old? This infuriates me.

Countless amounts of women and men (especially women) have reached into my daughter's stroller to touch her hands or feet, as if they knew me! First off, may I just point out that I have no idea who you are. Second, when was the last time you washed your hands? Do you know what the two most common things are that babies put in their mouth? Their hands and feet - the things you're going in there for! So now that package of chicken you picked up just before getting on line to checkout is still on your hands when you think it's okay to wiggle my daughter's fingers, so now she can put those dirty, germy hands in her mouth - thanks.

Did I mention that my daughter is a preemie? Did I mention that she has terrible skin sensitivities to all kinds of detergents, soap and fabric softeners. Not to mention lotions, perfumes and other assorted creams. Did I mention that just touching other people's clothes that have been washed or dried with any of the numerous chemicals that give her problems, can make her eczema flare up so badly that she needs steroid creams for a week. Oh, I didn't mention those things to you? That's because: YOU DIDN'T ASK FIRST! But you know what, I shouldn't have to mention it to you first, because it's honestly none of your business because you shouldn't be touching MY baby to begin with.

If she was five or ten you'd be going to jail for putting your hands on her body without her (or my) permission, so why is it okay before she's one? Is she public property before she can speak? Think about that before there is a next time, as it bothers me when I have to slam the canopy closed on your approaching hand only to get a dirty look from you as if I'm the one with the nerve.

Contributor's Note

This is a passionate rant that follows along with a similar rant I have about touching stranger's pregnant bellies. - Knock it off!

You are so right. People use to tell me I was rude because I did not want them handling my babies. But I always say better safe than sorry.

KKash Feb 18, 2010 09:48

I agree completely, but have a soft spot for the very old.

When they are very old, I would close the cover and say "I'm sorry she's very sick" and leave it at that - I was never really rude to them. It's the rest of them out there.......

As a man, an old man at that, I would never be allowed near a baby because of the reputation that the screeching viragoes have lumbered me with as a rapist and child molester.

The last time I touched a child that was not one of mine nor one of my grandchildren, it was to pick up a five or six year old who had been knocked down and injured by a cyclist on the pavement. The lynch mob that descended upon me and laid into me with umbrellas and shopping bags proved to me just how far down the road to insanity the human race has travelled.

Maybe you should carry a big stick and just lash out at anybody stupid enough to make free with your baby or simply put a big "Keep off the Baby" sign on your stroller with an explanation for the hard of common sense.

When you have done that maybe you can help an old man understand why he must watch an injured child bleed and scream in pain rather than help.

The world IS mad. Saying that, I would never be upset at someone helping my hurt child - those people were crazy! I would be grateful to anyone (despite the allergic consequences) who helped my daughter when she got hurt. There should be more people like that around.

My real point is, the people who so freely think it's okay to touch my daughter are not the ones who have to spend sleepless nights up with a child who now has an eczema flare up so bad that she tries to scratch her skin off, despite the fact that we tape mittens on her hands!

I know a woman who's child immediately starts screaming and doesn't stop for hours - all because a stranger got to close. He has autism and that's part of his problem, but his mom and dad have to suffer for the next few hours because someone couldn't keep their hands off him.

I think the worst offenders are the ones who don't even look at the parent, as if we don't exist. The zone in on baby and that's it. The thing is, if you took a moment to make eye contact with me, BEFORE reaching in, it would give me long enough to prevent you from ruining my family's next few days.

I think I'm going to get that big stick you suggested.....

With all of the knowledge that is available today on spreading germs, touching babies is certainly out of bounds. We try to teach our children to look, but don't touch. Good words for adults!
Best wishes.
Frederick

frederick Feb 18, 2010 19:20

My daughter worked in a retail store when she was 16. A lady came up to her and rubbed her belly and asked when it was due. She was NOT pregnant. She cried when she came home and told me

It is a disgusting world we live in when people decide that women's bellies are public property. If you're pregnant or not, it feels nasty when a strangers reaches out and rubs your belly. It's never acceptable. I once asked a woman after she touched me if it would be okay for me to touch her. She looked at me as if I was on drugs and said why would you touch ME? I told her one molestation deserves another, and I simply walked away leaving her with that thought.

*On a second note to this, I was raised with the concept of "never accuse any girl/woman of being pregnant unless she tells you she is, or you see the baby being born"

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